Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Hope. Poland & Auschwitz.

The best advice I've received on this whole trip perhaps was from a friend, Philipe, I made on the train to Krakow. He noticed my wounded feelings in response to the hostility of the Polish waiter and urged me to not take personally the general blunt attitude of the Poles. The Viennese are moderate, conservative and quiet. After expressing my frustration with trying to adapt to this European lifestyle vs. trying to stay true to myself in a place where my personality doesn't exactly fit in, he encouraged me to "Be yourself no matter where you are." Minus some volume control adjustments, I'm overjoyed to shamelessly be exactly who God made me to be!


This past weekend, the group traveled to Krakow, Poland and visited the largest German concentration camp during WWII. There’s a lot already that I’ve written regarding our experience at Auschwitz. For a quick summary though, it is unimaginable what happened there. Completely overwhelming emotions of guilt, sadness, conviction, heart ache, compassion, and disbelief surrounded me. The main point that has resonated within me from this experience is to learn to love others in a way that reflects God's love for us. I want to hurt when others hurt and to suffer with others when they are suffering. This semester is teaching me a lot about God’s character and creating the theme of "Humility before the Mystery." In bible class on Monday, we had a lesson on Psalm 44, also known as the "Holocaust Psalm" because it parallels the conditions of His chosen people throughout this tragic period in time. The Jewish people responded to the Holocaust by calling on God for mercy, letting go of all of the questions and struggles they were faced with and leaving them at the feet of the King - trying to hope in His promises. From a secular viewpoint, there's no hope to be seen from the Holocaust, but rather despair. Part of this psalm of disorientation, Psalm 44, is quoted in Romans 8: 36. Dr. Hicks made the point that "You are never going to figure out how much you are loved by how good life is to you. If you do try to measure it this way, you'll always be disappointed." He then directed us to the verses Romans 8:37-39, that follows the quote from Psalm 44, and it says,



 "No, in all these things we are more than conquerers through him who loved us. 
For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, 
will be able to separate us from the love of God 
that is in Christ Jesus our Lord."

THIS is how we see God's love for us. You can't doubt the love in Christ Jesus.

Dr. Hicks concluded our lesson with, "Don't let appearance mask reality." Our circumstances are the appearance. Jesus is the reality. There is our hope. As the saying goes, "At Auschwitz, the birds don't sing." The birds were singing at Auschwitz when we visited... I think of that as one of God's many signs of hope.




  • Welcome to Krakow, Poland!!





  •  Eating Georgian food!






  •  Some amazingggg hot chocolate - tasted like hot brownie batter. 




  •  Auschwitz II - Birkenau
















  •  Hitting up yet another hot chocolate hot spot!




  •  We took a horse carriage ride all around the main historical marks in Krakow!










  •  Beautiful architecture of Krakow
















  •  I found Izaak Stern's name at the Schindler's museum. Izaak Stern was Oskar Schindler's Jewish accountant who helped organize the "Schindler's List" and saved the lives of 1,200 Jewish people from the Holocaust. 




  • Some of us took an adventure to the famous salt mine in Wieliczka, Krakow to see the largest underground cathedral and many more interesting things... we may have licked a salt wall or two.






Well, this week has presented lost and found keys (Thank you God!! We would have had to pay 200 euro had it been lost), sickness that gets better each day, Kimmy's yummy chicken and rice and stir fry veggies, 4 hours of laundry today, my last taste of schokolade und vanille gelato from Tichy Eis, AND a travel itinerary plan to jump on a train to Bled, Slovenia tomorrow after school and end up in Venice, Italy by Saturday!! Now, THAT is something to look forward to!! Well, that's all for now folks!

Sending my love!! 

Lacy 



Romans 15:13

"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, 
so that you may overflow with hope by the power 
of the Holy Spirit!"

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Spiritual Restoration

PRAISE GOD! I feel like myself again!!! So this is how my blog was going to start out when I began typing it in Cafe Sperl earlier today:


"Today marks exactly two weeks since we left Nashville to travel 4,927.1 miles to Vienna, Austria (known here as Wien, Osterreich).

A lot has happened this week. My mind has been processing a lot. Because I don't know how to begin writing, I shall first present pictures of this past weeks endeavors: . . . "


.... BORING!! 

Right now I just feel like singing "I've got the joy joy joy joy down in my heart, where?!... It's down in my heart to stay! And I'm so happy, so very happy, I've got the love of Jesus in my heart, down in my heart... I've got the love of Jesus in my heart!"

So basically, these past two weeks I just haven't been feeling like myself. I've rarely been silly, I have had some fleeting moments of happiness but never true joy, and I've been stressed, anxious, and emotional! What had been frustrating me the most was that I didn't understand anything. Why was I being so emotional? Why was I randomly in a bad mood all of a sudden today? Why were my thoughts so unkind and selfish? Why did I feel annoying and inadequate? What is my role here in Vienna? Why was I becoming introverted?? And blah blah BLAH!

Last night, I slept well because I had devoted 25 minutes to God before bed, laying my burden downs before Him through writing everything out in my journal. Then today, Shelby and I went to the Mariahilf Kloster (Church) to pray. I spent my time writing in my journal and reading some psalms. At the end of my time of worship, I asked God for an intimacy with Him, with Jesus, with the Holy Spirit. I am tired of trying to do everything on my own. But I was hopeful. We went to Cafe Sperl to do work after that and upon leaving there, I found myself in a bitter mood for reasons I couldn't even explain. When there wasn't enough room to get on the U-Bahn, I said a bad word. Twice. I didn't like this so I immediately looked down and began to pray. During the next few minutes I felt the Holy Spirit telling me,
"Lacy, don't you know that your emotions don't determine WHO I AM?? I am faithful, I am constant, I am your Savior! You can choose Me right now because I will always be most important."
"How can I Jesus?"
"Choose me. Take the truth of who you know I am, put your fluctuating human emotions aside, and focus on me."
I then apologized to dear Shelby for my two seconds of a potty mouth and suggested we begin the "What are you thankful for" game.
As each minute went by, listing back and forth all the various blessing we have to be thankful for, my whole demeanor turned a 180.
God restored my joy today and I think I finally grasped in my heart a lesson that I've been learning in my mind for a while now. That lesson was finally put to action. I have peace right now - true peace that transcends understanding. My joyful Spirit is singing. The joy of the Lord is my strength!

"Praise be to the Lord, for he has heard my cry for mercy.
The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and I am helped.
My heart leaps for joy and I will give thanks to him in song."
Psalm 28:6-7

"Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal!"
2 Corinthians 4:16-18



Alas, a few highlighted details of this past week:
  • On Friday (14.9.2012), the group went to the Wien Museum which claims to cover history from the 6th Century B.C. to present day Vienna. I had a hard time paying attention during our loooooooooong tour throughout the three levels of the building. One of my favorite pieces in the museum was a stained glass window. The museum had preserved all of the original stained glass windows from the Stephansdom, before it was bombed during WWII. 



  •  Also in the Wien Museum was an exhibit celebrating this years 150th birthday of Gustav Klimt, most famous for his painting "The Kiss." (The 2nd picture below is another famous one of the woman he loved. We will get to see "The Kiss" when we go to the Belvedere!) 

  • Pistachios from the Naschmarkt. YUMMY.  

  • So... we attempted to attend the English mass at the Stephansdom that is at 7 pm on Saturday nights. Instead of the English service being held in the beautiful sanctuary you can see below, it was downstairs in a sketch cellar-esque room packed with people out the door... we opted out for Cafe Diglas instead.

  • As you can see, Cafe Diglas was the better option of the two. Bratwurst and saur kraut with roasted potatoes? BITTE! It was delicious. Followed by the pretty, pink rum cake below!


  • ALSO, the bathrooms in Cafe Diglas are one of a kind. They will throw you for a spin when you first walk in to see the bathroom stalls are completely see through. It's no until you go inside and lock the stall door that it fogs over to give you privacy! (you can't even see Kimmy in the stall on the right, but Shelby sure is entertained on the left! haha)

  • Brandon and Michael dancing at the U-Bahn stop near our apartment... I think it's pretty self explanatory. 

  • Tichy Eis is AMAZING! Literally, the best gelato that exists. Yes, that means Austrian gelato is superior to Italian. I die a little inside when I think about the fact that it closes for the cold seasons after September 30th. Only 11 days left! My favorite is when I order like this, "Ich mochte ein tasse mit shokolade, vanille und kaffee bitte!" 


  •  This is the pretty ceiling in Cafe Sperl. Shelbs and I have already become quite fond of this laid back establishment. 

  • I love how its so casual for this guy to play his sax on the U-Bahn for money. I can respect that. 




  • We have focused our studies this week on the history of Judaism. I was amazed to learn that in Vienna, prejudice attitudes and separation from the Jewish community began in the 1400s when the Jews could tax with interest but the Christian's religion forbid them to. So money was one of the original causes of the growing hostility between Catholic Vienna and the Jewish people also living there. We visited the Judenplatz where the pictures of the Holocaust memorial can be seen below. This memorial is so symbolic because it is made of thousands of books whose binds aren't readable/shown. They represent all of the lost stories of the lives taken through this nightmare in history. The doors to the front of the monument purposefully don't have handles suggesting the loss forever of the memories and Jewish culture. 
    •  Reading “Night” by Eliezer Wiesel really set the mood for what I can expect out of this weekend’s trip to Krakow, Poland to visit Auschwitz. I use the word “expect” but I don’t think that experiencing what we are about to go see is something that you can prepare yourself for. I honestly don’t know what to “expect.” I know that reading Wiesel’s story from his experiences during the Holocaust was life changing. It is so encouraging to see the conclusion he comes to in his Nobel Peace Prize acceptance speech when he says that, “Our lives no longer belong to us alone; they belong to all those who desperately need us.” and “Action is the only remedy to indifference, the most insidious danger of all.” We are selfish to deprive others of God within ourselves. Our calling is to be Jesus in this world. “To be” is to have action. And unfortunately there are still many unjust things occurring in our world today. Yet, I fear what the world would look like now had the Holocaust not happened. I am so thankful for the memorial that Elie Wiesel’s life is, for the memorial that Auschwitz is, for Anne Frank’s diary, The Gates of Violence Memorial by the Albertina that we visited today, and many more things that serve to remind the world of these terrible times. Our world cannot act like these things didn’t happen because we open doors inviting history to repeat itself; which unfortunately seems to be the case. I can say that I look forward to the eye opening experience that Krakow is sure to be.




  •  Getting to talk to Kyle Cub on our 5 MONTH ANNIVERSARY was a highlight (: 



  • You really learn how to get crafty when you're on your own.
    • Honey goes with ANYTHING
    • non-stick cooking pans are a MUST
    • panty liners double as bandaids (protecting from the many blisters you WILL receive from walking so much)
    • Kimmy's contact solution is a perfect substitute for hydrogen peroxide when avoiding infection
    • buy a cheap packet of soup, fresh carrots, and left over bow tie noodles to create a yummy dinner for two - with left overs!

  • Tonight's pizza looked NOTHING like the picture on the front... but it was actually DELICIOUS!


  • We had a wonderful chocolate tasting time after dinner tonight. 


  •  Now, for one of the neatest and most unique Vienna experiences I could have imagined:
    • I present to you Ernst Fuchs at Cafe Hawelka! Google him (or check out the links below), then share in my amazement of this encounter! Also, if you would like to read the story I posted below - it's just what I wrote immediately after my encounter with Mr. Fuchs to make sure I could record all that I could remember!
    • http://www.ernstfuchs-gallery.com/estart.html
    • http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ernst_Fuchs_(artist)
    • http://fantasticvisions.net/blog/news/2010/10/11/ernst-fuchs-klagenfurt-apocalypse-chapel-completed/
      • I read a quote this summer that said, “Believing in God means believing that everything happens for a reason.” This means that every second of every day is ordained, perfectly planned by God. Today, Shelby and myself chose Café Hawelka as our afternoon study spot. No longer than 5 minutes after sitting down at a cozy booth inside, Ernst Fuchs, self-acclaimed as “The Fire Fox”, approached us. We had no clue of whose presence we were graced with when this whimsical old fellow asked to join us at our table. For the first several minutes, he entertainingly enlightened us with his historical knowledge and opinions, including: he thought very highly of the Queen of England in her old age and of her protection over Christianity from the Islamic people, he though Jesus to be a very beautiful man – also was under the impression that Leonardo da Vinci was a mentor to Jesus of Nazareth… one of da Vinci’s students painted a portrait of da Vinci, he informed us of the star Orion, the star of orientation (“that can only be seen at night” he added) that any being can look to for orientation. This might have been the subject of the poem he wrote last night that he wanted to read to us, but he unfortunately couldn’t find it on him. He did, however, find a dry cleaning ticket and money in his jacket pocket. This discovery prompted him to tell us that he should be paying bills with that money.
        You see, Herr Ernst let us in on a secret. Today, he spent a lot of money on the “stroll” he went on. And he never gets to take his time and shop or go to a café because he is always “quickly driving through.” What for and where to would a modern day da Vinci himself (Ernst is an architect, composer, poet, singer, painter, sculptor, writer and so on…) be going? I haven’t a clue. One thing he did make clear: his wife, who he left us to go meet up with, would be very mad at him for spending so much money that she doesn’t think they have. According to 82 year old Mr. Fire Fox though, they have the money… “if you just believe.” Haha, I tagged on, “God always provides.” He smiled.
        In the beginning of our encounter, when Shelby and I were still contemplating the sanity of our new friend, we asked him what some of his works were. He wanted to know if we had heard of the Steinhof of the Hall of Scrolls. At first, I thought he was the Herr Hawelka I had heard about – the owner of this character-filled establishment. Ha! Boy, was I in for a treat! When I asked him, shortly into our discussion, “Und wie heissen Sie?” He casually responded, “Ich heisse Ernst Fuchs – or Ernest Fox to you!” And immediately a couple behind us got up to request his autograph. The woman receiving his signature enthusiastically update us on Ernst’s lofty level of fame and talent… yeah, he chose Shelby and I to “hang out” (he was amused by my use of this phrase) with for about 25 minutes this wunderbar afternoon!
        What is one to take from all of this?? Although his conversation was so random and scattered, I am kicking myself for not memorizing every word that left his mouth! Oh, the thought of studying under Ernst Fuchs - filling up with his knowledge attained through 82 years across all of Europe, creating history. I am still dumb-founded. And to think that some people feel “molested” (he told us) by his approach sometimes (obviously fools who don’t know who he is!). He said he could tell that we probably wouldn’t be put off by his approach. He also said he thought I was beautiful. This compliment now holds much more flattery. Wow. I am so thankful that Shelbs snapped a picture of him with her iPhone when he was writing to me what I have as a keep sake: his instruction to us to go see his favorite work of art: “Go to Klagenfurt to see the Chapel of the Apocalypse.” He told us that after we visited it, “then you will understand!” I guess we have to go now to even understand what he is talking about!
        Of course after bidding him adieu, expressing the pleasure his presence had been and my excitement to call him a friend (of which he called us something else in German that I didn’t understand), we immediately googled him. Shelbs said that people had been coming in to the café and sneaking pictures of him this whole time! When the images to the googled phrase “Klagenfurt Chapel of the Apocalypse” came up… all I could think was, “Did this really just nonchalantly happen?!” Still sitting in the café now, I gaze to my right to see one of his paintings on the wall of a cherub’s head. I just want to give my heavenly Father a “run and jump, thanks dad for the coolest and most unexpected present ever” hug regarding this occasion.
        Dear God, why did you have Shelby wake me up from my nap and beckon me to accompany her to our last minute decision of Café Hawelka to “hang out” with “The Fire Fox” Ernst Fuchs??? What do I take from this experience?? Does God want me to take certain things lessons from this?! Am I going to find out later? Did my Father really just feel like sprinkling in a “cool experience” to brighten my Vienna experience?? Surely it’s more than just that! This sort of thing certainly does not happen every day! Ernst says he comes to Café Hawelka often (the waiter later told us that he’ll make an appearance about once a month). I really hope I get to see him again, and that he remembers me!
        Lizzie McQuire’s Roman holiday looks shallow next to my European encounter. (Character) Paolo Putanesca vs. Ernst Fuchs?? Ha! “This is what dreams are made of!” Thank you God for sweet serendipity. Willkommen auf Wien… I’ll say!



  •  This is his letter to me! (And signature! - the German writing by the heart means "from the heart"!)


Well, I'd say that is certainly enough for now!

Sending my love!!

Lacy



Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Willkommen in Wien

So the journey begins...

This transition is much harder than I expected. I've always had a passion for travel, other cultures and adventure! However, after living in Vienna for one week and one day, I crave anything that reminds me of home. I chose to visit Starbucks today for my usual caramel macchiato instead of seeking out one of Vienna's local, character-filled cafes. At the grocery store, I bought the Pepperidge Farm chocolate chip cookies and Honey Barbecue Kettle Chips. I ordered the New York cheesecake instead of trying a Viennese sweet. I cried myself to sleep two nights ago and I have become a bit of an introvert.

Going into this, I knew it would be hard. But the hardest times in my life have shaped me into who I am today. And although I may not be where I would like to be all of the time, I thank God that I am not where I used to be. I wouldn't know Him and His love had I not fallen from my comfortable, prideful periods of life. God has healed this heart over and over again and there's so much left to be done. However, "In order for God's kingdom to advance, things have got to change. Even if things may feel great now. If things are staying the same, then life doesn't exist there" (Dave Clayton preached this at an Ethos service on August 18th). This note that I quickly jotted down has stuck with me since. I was comfortable where I was. I had finally gotten back to Lipscomb, my safe haven where I was reunited with all of my uplifting friends after my difficult summer. I was finally living in the same city as my sweet boyfriend again, seeing him and holding him anytime I pleased. I was just far enough from home to not be annoyed by my family and just close enough to be comforted by them. I was able to attend Ethos Church again. My Spirit was overjoyed to once again feed off of the encouragement that these familiar hearts pour out. Despite all of this, I have experienced many parts of the flesh in myself that need to be removed. In order for me to be the Christian who God calls me to be, I must submit to His control, fully trusting His will, and allow Him to rid me of my selfish endeavors. I'm sure this will be an ongoing lesson throughout my life. 

Prior to this trip, I viewed this time in Vienna as an opportunity to disconnect from the distracted and busy America where one has an hour to waste on Facebook but can only spare maybe 5 minutes for a quick Jesus Calling devo in the morning; and rather, to plug into the relaxed Europe with 3 hour meal times and devout Catholics meditating on the reverent, almighty God while on their knees in their extravagant churches. What I'm realizing here is that this trip will transform you as much as you will allow it to. Your focus is going to go where you put it. Your attitude will be whatever you choose for it to be, whether you're having a wonderful day or a crappy day. And if I am spending my days dwelling on what I am missing out on back home, then I am depriving myself of the adventures that I can experience here in every moment. I know all of this but I'm still having a hard time letting go of what is comfortable. God gives me so much hope for what is to come though!

The bible teaches that a thankful heart is a happy heart! I pray that God helps me to place my focus on Him and all of the gifts that He blesses me with each day. I want to be shaped by His love and I want others to experience Him through me. I want to return home to the USA with my trust in God's faithfulness. A verse that has become repetitive in my mind is, "Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus" (Philippians 4:4-7). 



Now for an update on my experiences so far!!
  • Motrin PM was my best friend for the overnight, long flight over - I got almost 5 hours of sleep!
  • I packed WAY too much to carry. My back is just now recovering from carrying everything and I got lectured on my excess by a lady who worked at the airport in Munich :-/ But I'm thankful to have it all now in my apartment! #sorrynotsorry?
  • I experienced extreme culture shock on the first day because I had no idea what anyone was saying, how to use any public transportation or read the maps, where I was, etc. 
  • I have mastered the ways of the U-Bahn and I can get myself almost anywhere. I know where almost everything is - grocery trips get easier every time! I am getting a hang of conversing with the locals ("Gruss Gott" is how the Austrians greet each other - it translates to "Greet God" - I love using this when I walk into a store and receive a friendly smile from the worker there)
  • Took a tour of the Schonbrunn Palace and the whole area around it is remarkably gorgeous!

  • Went to the Prater amusement park and rode the tallest swing in the world AND rebelliously snuck my camera up with me in my sleeve so that I could take this picture!!


  • Got to ride my first slingshot ride ever with Reed Sircy and it was AWESOME!!


  •  And got to ride again for FREE with Igor from... some other European country! He was a pilot, I discovered through our talk 150 feet up in the air!


  •  Failed at the Austrian (European in general maybe? but DEFINITELY NOT American) ride of standing up and dancing to the DJ's music while the ride spins wildly out of control... we got slammed to our butts. I have a big bruise on my arm but it was still fun!


  • I went to the flea market and bought my boyfriend a gift that I cannot wait to give him and I'm having a hard time keeping it a secret! I also bought a little Wien charm that has been added to my cross necklace that you will begin to see in pictures! I also purchased two fall/winter scarves for 5 euro each - spankin' deal!! And I tried a kabob sandwich (I think is what it's called... it was a teeny bit sketchy but still tasty) and the most AMAZING peach I've ever had in my whole life! The juice trickled down mine and Shelby's chins and arms as we savored it (: 
  • At the Harvest Festival, which is unfortunately over now, I tried the most scrumptious juice I've ever had! It's the harvested grape juice and I learned how to order it correctly by saying, "Ich mochte ein traubermost bitte"! And I kept the glass mug as a souvenir, which has been very useful for my hourly glass of milk cravings in the apartment. 


  •  We visited a high point near the edge of the Vienna Woods to catch this pretty view below! 


  • Then we hiked down the vineyard laced mountains and bought the most delightful honey that I've eaten on toasted bread with peanut butter and banana every day!
  • Hiked up an extremely steep hill to see this beautiful view below!

  • Went to German mass in the St. Augustine church where Maria Theresa, Franz Joseph and Elisabeth of Austria all got married! 

  • Visited, for the second time, the oldest church in Vienna - St. Ruprechts! It had a dead body of a saint found in the Catacombs in Rome in it! And the oldest stained glass window (in Vienna I believe)

  • Eaten a BUNCH of NUTELLA, naturally
  • I LOVE my German teacher Frau Wurtzl - she is so funny and helpful!!
  • I am almost through reading Night by Elie Wiesel and there is more to come on this after the Krakow, Poland trip. It blows my mind that this happened in our world not that long ago. I anticipate this trip to Auschwitz. I know it will be extremely hard to take in, but I want to visit it and see it for myself. 
  • I've tried so many different chocolates and breads and I've gone on one run... haha. We walk so much here though! I'm hoping my love for exercise will equate to my love for food on this trip... doubtful!
  • Meditated in a few churches and I plan on setting apart times to visit them alone for quiet time - I really want this to happen! These churches create such a transcendent atmosphere!


Simply uploading these pictures and writing about them has helped me to reflect on the wonderful experiences that I've already had so far, and to be thankful for them! My mood is cheery despite the rain outside. Honestly the pitter patter with the open window is quite soothing; no head ache here! 

Well, this is all for now! This was my first post so I guarantee the others will not be so long! I'll try to update as much as I can and I would love responses since this blog is intended to keep me in touch with everyone back home! Just reply on here on email me at LacyHartselle@gmail.com (: 

I send my love to everyone - you are all missed so very much!! 



Lacy (: